Distancing yourself emotionally and putting self-care at the centre of your philosophy. Understanding that even though the situation will always affect you, it does not have to hurt you can be ways to heal as fatherless daughters.
Being a fatherless daughter is too often rationalised. It is not enough considered as a social issue. The lack of acknowledgement is an obstacle regarding the healing process of those daughters. There need to be more mechanisms, social projects, digital resources, mentoring projects regarding this issue. To this day those are unattainable to many fatherless daughters.
Being fatherless makes you more vulnerable to depression and anxiety. Fatherlessness can impact daughters differently depending on its nature, on the daughter social environment and the daughter personality. However, it often results in self-blame in cases of voluntary absence and low self-esteem in many instances.
Throughout the years, I questioned myself as a person like anyone else. However, when I was going through valleys, that pain contributed to my misery. As fatherless daughters it can cross your mind that: “At the end of the day how could others put up with you when your own flesh and blood decided to give up on you?”. You wonder if you are lovable at all since it appears that your own father does not love you enough to care for you. I am convinced that any fatherless daughters can heal from the psychological trauma experienced. It is a long process and a consciousness work.
To break free from those emotional barriers:
Forgiveness is powerful, it helps you reconcile yourself with your story and restore yourself on a higher mental level. It is essential to let go of resentment. Forgive him and hope him well too, forgiveness is all about you. It does not mean that you forget where you came from. It means that you are willing to take the step necessary to feel well. You are willing to release pain, anger and negativity which in turn can only leave more room for love, happiness and joy.
Someone who can let go of their own child must be dealing with their own issues. It is important to understand that it has nothing to do with you, that it is not personal and that you are not unworthy. Most importantly, you are worthy of your own appreciation. The certainty that his absence is not your fault needs to be digested.
Tools that helped me
Read impactful content: Read content on forgiveness, on the importance of self-love and of self-worth.
Meditate on forgiveness: Inhale and exhale focusing on forgiveness.
“Forgiveness is to offer no resistance to life, to allow life to live through you.The alternatives are pain and suffering, a greatly restricted flow of life energy, and in many cases physical disease. The moment you truly forgive, you have reclaimed your power from the mind. “ E. Tolle